Archive | August 2017

New Post…

As I continue to learn about WordPress and the blogging world, I find myself making many mistakes. The post I published yesterday was no exception. Once again, a lesson learned.

The link didn’t get sent to my subscribers or to my social media outlets so I am sending the link now so no one will miss out.

When To Write

To all my blogger friends, any words of encouragement are appreciated!

Hope everyone has a wonderful day. Pray for those in the midst of the tropical storm on the gulf coast.

When To Write

When You’re Not A Morning Person Or A Night Owl?

As I began this journey of blogging (which hasn’t been long), I had a hard time finding the best time to write. I tried reading and note taking in the mornings as I got up. This was hard because I don’t like to do anything before I have my coffee and by the time I have made my cup of coffee my kid is up and running. Then I tried focusing a little during quiet-time, but I would get distracted by things that need to be done around the house. Then I tried writing at night after everyone had gone to bed and I would be yawning the entire time and eventually lose focus. It didn’t seem to be working.

Need Coffee

I am a mom and a wife and I help my grandmother who recently moved in with us. Time is precious. Let me rephrase…alone time is precious. I stay home and homeschool our son. He is only in kindergarten but everything is a learning experience when you’re a kid, right? I like taking care of my family and take some pride in keeping our house mostly clean. I also enjoy spending time with my husband when he comes home from work. So when I stay so busy during the day I don’t really have time to write then and daytime is when I’m at my best.
Let me tell you a little about my day so you can have a better picture.

 

When I get up in the mornings, I like to drink my coffee and “wake up”. As I said earlier, I am not a morning person so quiet in the mornings is exactly what I need. That’s hard with a 5 year old who is wide open as soon as he gets up. I just need a little time but sometimes I don’t get any wake up time. Once the coffee has somewhat kicked in, I am on the go until after lunch; preparing breakfast, cleaning, schooling, figuring out what’s for supper, and then preparing lunch. After lunch we have quiet-time where Mr. B has to lay down and be quiet. Usually my grandmother goes and lays down as well and so I am left alone. My time is then filled with cleaning what I couldn’t finish that morning and maybe getting a little rest myself. I have been able to write some thoughts during that time, especailly if Mr. B falls asleep. Around 4 pm I get the kitchen ready and start supper. I really like super easy meals such as one-pot, sheet pan and crockpot meals because they are easy and a breeze to clean up. Anyway, after that we have some play time, then bath and our normal bedtime routine. We start the bedtime routine around 7:30 pm only because it takes him so long to get still and fall asleep. He’ll get up a million times and call us into his room a million more. Needless to say, bedtime is frustrating. We are still working on it.

 

Dishes are done!

After cleaning up the dishes and getting the kitchen back in order I try to write, but my mind is on the events of the day and I have a hard time reigning my brain back in. By the time I have good thoughts rolling in, I’m so tired and ready for bed that I can’t focus. However I have found that staying up late gets me a little more alone time. 11pm has been the max, though. By that time I am turning into a pumpkin and need to get to bed ASAP!

 

So, when does a writer write when they aren’t a morning person or a night owl? When they can’t get up to write before others get up AND they can’t hang late at night to write after everyone has gone to sleep? Well, I do it in spurts throughout the day. LIke I said at the beginning of this post. I write ideas, topics and drafts thoughtout the day. I have an ongoing list of topics I keep and add to as they come to me. Each day I try to write some thoughts or ideas that I have for those topics. Some days it’s a lot while other days it’s a little. Some I have outlines for already and those are just waiting to be drafted. And for others it’s just a matter of finding the right words.

Have I found the best time to just sit and write? No. I don’t believe that time exists right now for me. It would be nice to be able to sit for hours and finish a thought from idea to blog post, but for me, right now, that is just not possible. I am sure the more I write, the better I’ll get and the more evolved my time management will become. But as for now, this is it. Writing here and there as I can and keeping it real. Just leave me alone in the mornings, especially before my coffee and make sure I go to bed at a decent hour at night and it’s all good for now. This is homegrown chaos at its best.

How about you? Are you a morning person or a night person? Maybe you’re like me and you are neither. Leave a comment below.

This entry was posted on August 23, 2017, in Uncategorized.

Sigh…

GONE…Disappeared…Unrecoverable…How?…Why?… And as I sit here trying to retype that same post, to try to rewrite the words that so quickly dissipated off the screen, I am at a loss of words. Should I just wait to try to rewrite it? Maybe write something different and come back to that topic at a later time?

I am distraught about the fact that I wrote a pretty good post about discrimination last night and when I went to save the draft on WordPress, an error message came up and all my writing was gone. It was such a great post about discrimination and what I had experienced in Birmingham, Alabama several years ago. I had eloquently written at how wonderful the history is there and how my mom and I travel together and spend time with one another. It was so relevant to what is going on today and I thought, what better time to write about this experience than now?

As a mom, time is limited on when I can write. I stayed up late to finish the post knowing my son would wake up early the next morning and I would have to get up with him. You moms know what I’m talking about. We stay up late for some ME time. Just a little quiet time for ourselves while everyone is asleep. And it was nice…until my draft was gone. I frantically searched for it! I tried everything to recover it. It was all useless. It was no longer in existence.

I tried not to worry about it last night as I lay in bed. I tried not to spend too much time desperately searching AGAIN this morning since I was helping my son with school. I knew it would just frustrate me even more and frustrate him for me not giving him the attention he deserves and needs.

I know it is just words. Just a few hours wasted. But it was a hard thing to write about. It was personal to me and brought back some tough memories. I know deep down there is a reason it is gone and I understand that I can rewrite it and maybe it will turn out better than the first one. But it doesn’t take away my disappointment. I’ve also learned a valuable lesson about writing and blogging. As the day continues I will try not to dwell on the lost post and maybe pick back up tonight with something fresh. I’m only able to write this little bit because it is “quiet time” in my house and Mr. B is napping for the moment. However I have other things I need to be doing around the house.

Just another story from a homewife moment. We are homegrown chaos and life lessons for sure!

My BFF Came To Town!

I don’t know about you but I when I get a text or phone call from my best friend, I get all excited. We are apart more than we are together these days so to hear from her means the world to me. So needless to say that I was super excited to get the text…”I’ll be in [town] 7 aug.” YAY!! My best friend from high school, as in my best good friend, someone who can never be replaced, who introduced me to my husband, my matron of honor at my wedding, who joined the Air Force a couple of years after graduation, but someone (the only one besides my husband) I could tell ANYTHING to, was coming to town for the first time in a looooooong time. I was super-duper excited! I mean, we graduated high school 18 years ago and she doesn’t visit often. The last time I had seen her it just so happened her and her family moved back to the states while I was visiting the town they were moving to…the very week they moved there and that was about 4 years ago. So I  am sure you can relate to how excited I was to get that text! August 7th couldn’t get here quick enough.

My BFF and me!

 

Unfortunately, the day Cyndi arrived we didn’t get together only because I knew her parents wanted to spend some time with her and her family. But the next day we met for lunch as two families. It was as if we had never been apart. I wasn’t expecting to have such an emotional feeling when we hugged at first but I guess I was so overjoyed of just seeing her and knowing how much I had missed her. We sat for several hours talking about our families and our past. It was just so cool. We picked up right where we left off. You know what I mean? It was as if we were never apart. And I know this sounds terrible but neither one of us are good at keeping in touch so we had a LOT to talk about. Finally getting together in person was like being right back in high school where we were so comfortable with each other just hanging out.

Cyndi and her husband have 4 kids: a boy in the military (military family), a boy in high school, a 10-year-old girl and 8-year-old boy. That night we all hung out together. I could’ve stayed all night talking and reminiscing. Our kids got along perfectly and we all had a great time together. How wonderful it was to sit and talk and watch our kids get along so well. I SO wish we all lived closer together. Our families just meshed so well. With her only having a few days here we decided the next day we would have a girls day at the mall while the boys spent a boys day doing whatever boys do on a boys day. They also enjoyed the biggest banana split you have ever seen!

The boys enjoying the biggest banana split ever!

 

 

Her daughter…my “neice”. We had such a great connection!

On her last day they came to our house for a few hours. Just hanging out together is super awesome. It was sad knowing she was leaving the next morning but we made the best of our time together. Nothing fancy, no hoopla. Just sitting on the car port talking about life. I will surely miss her and her family but they didn’t leave without us planning to get together again however it can’t be soon enough.

 

 

The 3 of us having a great time together…you know…taking selfies!

Since her visit, I have thought a lot about her and why we make getting together and contacting each other so difficult. I know we all get busy. Life gets going into overload and overtime and we can miss that comfortable feeling. The simple life sitting on the porch or on the couch just talking about life. I know I should do better at calling my friend. Or just send a thoughtful text occasionally.

 

Do you have that best friend from high school or college? That one person, that no matter how long you haven’t spoken to each other or texted, you can come together years later and be as comfortable today as you were 18 years ago? I am so blessed to say I do and I encourage you today to send them a text, mail them a letter or even call them just to tell them you miss them. Take some time to catch up on life.

I’d love to hear your best friend stories. Do y’all still get together? Do your families get along?

Hello world!

Hello world! The “unique” title of my first blog post. Actually, it was already titled and I thought it sufficient enough to keep. This first post is unrehearsed and more than likely unrefined however this raw, unscripted post will be real and tell more about who I am.

I wanted to begin a blog several years ago. I really believe that there are some moms out there that need some encouragement and to know they are not alone. Believe me when I say there are times I have felt that I was the only one dealing with some of these struggles. Life is chaotic, and crazy, and awesome and fun all wrapped together in a large gift bag with a couple pieces of used tissue paper…

because who has time to actually wrap a gift these days?

I’m 37 years old. I have been married to an amazing husband and father since 1999. We had our beautiful baby boy in 2012. After trying for 10 years to have a baby we finally decided to try IVF and was blessed with our son on the first round. I’ve worked since I was 14 years old and always knew I would grow up and be a “successful” working mom. However when our son was born I had this pull to stay at home with him. So after 3 years of being a “successful” working mom, I quit my job and became a stay-at-home mom. I placed successful in quotations because I’m not really sure how successful I actually was. I’m sure it depends on who you talk to. But WOW! This was HUGE! So different than how I was raised and very different than what I had in mind when I was a young girl dreaming of how my adult life was going to be.

I would love to go into more detail about our IVF experience, but I’ll save that story for another time. It truly is an amazing story.

And a talk about my childhood experiences is one to really be intrigued about. Nonetheless, my adulthood has some pretty complicated and chaotic drama in itself. Of course, who doesn’t have drama in their life?

Oh my goodness…to not have DRAMA!

As much as I have tried to stay away from drama, it seems it finds me! Really? Why is this? I have asked myself and my husband if I am the one. Am I the one that starts or contributes to the drama? He tells me no however there are times I begin to wonder and then I focus on my actions and my words towards other people just to make sure. I even try to pull myself away from the situation. All in good conscience. I don’t want to be in the middle of drama, much less be the one who starts it. Sometimes it’s inevitable, yet other times you truly have to dismiss yourself from the situation altogether. Anyone with me on this?

So let’s talk about struggles. Should I list them? There are so many. Being an adult is hard. Just hard. Now, I’ll throw myself in the floor and kick and scream this out loud!

BEING AN ADULT IS HARD!

Being a wife is a little different than what I imagined. Did you imagine waking up next to your husband in your pretty pajama’s, with makeup already on and hair fixed perfectly? Where you laid next to each other in blissful love? Dinner’s by candlelight and you each looked into each other’s eyes singing love songs to each other as you never had an argument and you got everything you always wanted? Goodness, what a crazy, unrealistic belief of wedded bliss! Don’t get me wrong. We love each other with all our hearts and neither one of us can imagine life without the other, but never arguing?! And singing love songs to each other?! And waking up looking perfect?! I really feel bad sometimes for what my husband wakes up to.

Being a mom is hard! What? YES! Being a mom is HARD! Becoming a mom was HARD! I just knew after waiting 10 years to have a baby that being a mom would be euphoric. I would be the best mom ever! WRONG! I love being a mom. and Mr. B is awesome but some days I feel like the worst mom ever! Especially on those mornings when you want five more minutes of sleep and when you finally get up, your kid has raided the candy stash for breakfast. I’m sure no mother has ever let their kid eat candy for breakfast! Well, I have. And cheese crackers (no joke! He ate cheese crackers yesterday I’ll just stop there. I have plenty of examples, but why discuss those here when I can write an entire blog or two or 10 about my mean, awful mommy stories!

That’s the biggest struggles however we have recently moved my grandmother in with us so we can help take care of her, my son starts Kindergarten this year and we have decided to homeschool him. I also work part-time as a choreographer for the local youth theater and teach dance to children. Not only that, but we are involved with our church and we have a personal discipleship ministry where we try to minister one-on-one with others. Lastly, I am hoping our family can start doing service projects in our community this year volunteering with the local senior center.

I have so many plans for this blog. I’m really excited to finally get it going and hope it can be encouraging to you. Since this is my first blog post, it seems I’m all over the place. However, I wanted to give you an overview of who I really am and a bit about what you might find in my writings. I hope it is encouraging to you and that you will come back to my blog.

Life isn’t always sunshine and roses but with the rain we can jump in the puddles and other flowers smell good too.